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To whom it may concern (and I’m guessing there’s a lot of you),

I would like to apologize for my lack of prompt replies to your text messages. You probably think I’m a snob, which is a pretty girly thing to say, but I’m not. Well, I probably am, but not intentionally. You probably think that I don’t consider your messages important enough to warrant my precious time and attention. The lateness of my replies, if I ever do send replies, can be attributed to only one thing, and one thing alone: I HATE MOBILE PHONES.

OK, that’s too strong. Let me rephrase that: I’m not fond of always checking my mobile phone especially when I’m at home. Some of you may find this strange, maybe even retarded, but what are you gonna do? I hate checking my phone for new messages. I even hate hearing it ring or beep, that’s why I always keep it in “Meeting” mode. It’s actually more discreet than “Silent” mode in its default settings. Anyway, yeah. Don’t expect an immediate answer if you’re going to call me. Don’t think I’m blowing you off. I’m not. And don’t think I’m only doing it to you. I do it to everybody.

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Scientists say that 7% of the Internets is all about asshattery and dickery, while 3% is serious business. The remaining 90% is porn. I can attest to the porn number, and this blog more or less falls under the Asshattery & Dickery category. For the serious business side of the Internets, though, I have the perfect examples. I know this for I have firsthand accounts. Yes, ladies and gentlecreeps, all this bogus statistics bull is just an introduction to my pimping of the following:

Bum No More is a blog about tips and guides on employment, lifestyle, and other things that might interest new college graduates and young upwardly mobile professionals. It’s only been online for less than two months, but it already has a wealth of wisdom ready to be devoured by hungry young job seekers and corporate n00bs. Aside from this, job seekers can also subscribe to the Bum No More Weekly Newsletter that features entry level job openings every week.

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I’ve had my Facebook account for quite a while but I never got around to updating and playing around with it. But with all the recent hype, I decided to dick around and explore if it really deserves all the noise. I have to admit, I’m very much impressed. I’m seriously considering leaving my other social networking accounts and start nesting in Facebook.

There’s one huge-ass problem, though. Most of my friends are still fixated on Friendster and Multiply. I think it’s up to me to convince them to consider getting a Facebook account, if not to totally make it their primary social networking site. With this in mind, I’m going to do a series of posts to pimp Facebook, and you’re all going to read it whether you like it or not.

But before I proceed, let me just point out that the screenshots you see here are products of the Jing Project software. Mike “Fucking” Villar did a nice review on this Jing thingamajig, and you should read it. If not, he’ll rape you. That’s a promise.

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You know when you’re bored and you try to do stupid unproductive things just to kill time? That’s what led me to signing up for a Flixster account. Stupid me didn’t realize that I already had an account with Flixster, so I just updated the shit out of it instead of doing the whole account registration thing again.

A lot of similarly bored (I’m assuming) friends already invited me to join the movie-based social networking site, but I was too busy stalking people on Friendster and bugging people on Multiply with my stupid comments on their updates. But boredom makes people do stupid things. And since I already have an assload of social networking accounts, adding one more wouldn’t hurt.

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I’ve just been invited to join Facebook by an online friend. Bored like hell, I decided to bite and I registered. Plus, I also decided to update all my social networking accounts. And I just realized there’s a lot.

How many social networking sites do we really need? Or want, for that matter. I’m thinking sure, you get to stay updated with the lives of your real life and online friends, classmates, co-workers, and old flames. But you also encounter spammers, stalkers, posers, losers, and other types of freaks.

No, I don’t want to “add you as a friend”. And I don’t want to visit you at your other network. Unless by “sexygirlscutepets” you mean “sexy girls as cute pets”. Freak.

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