Last month, I didn’t write anything for this blog. This is very unusual because I write about anything that remotely registers as “interesting” in my life and last month was more than remotely interesting. You see, in March of 2011, I fell in love with a girl. (Yes, this is one of those sappy entries. Get out now while you still can.) She had me in her thrall SO HARD that nothing else seemed to matter — including blogging. One minute, I’m stalking her online and the next, I find myself in complete surrender. Maggie. That’s her name. Maggie the Marvelous Monarch of Mischief and Moxie.

I’d like to believe that I’m good with words. Sometimes, I even believe that I’m smarter and more witty than your average Internet person. OK, I always believe that. Because I’m a douche. In my mind, I am awesome and charming and intelligent and funny and I can never find my equal. I feel unstoppable. And then I met Maggie and I was stumped. Here is a girl who is able to outsmart me at every turn. She outwits me every time I think I am the wittiest of the witty. She charms the shit out of me and I am helpless. As God is my witness, she actually makes me think before I say anything. I never do that! She is one sneaky lady, that Maggie. I hate her.

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Whenever something or someone fascinates me enough, I get inspired to write a blog post. Sometimes, I write poetry (SHUT UP). And then there are those rare moments when I get the urge to write an entire a book. Of course, it’s only an urge. I never get the chance to actually start writing one. Well, except for that one time when I wrote half a chapter of a book about the staff of a high school newspaper fighting terrorists and werewolves. I digress. The point is, I feel like writing a book right now and it, like most of my dumb ideas, is inspired by a girl.

I would start the book with how I met her. How that night became legendary for us and our friends. I shall call this chapter “That Fateful Night”. I’ll discuss the intricate relationships involved and how, in a span of a few months, it all got increasingly complicated to the point of total hilarity.

I would follow that up with a chapter on how she started to blow my mind with her sense of humor, spirit and several talents. The day I said “Hooo boy. This girl’s Trouble.”

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