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It’s been a while since I talked about myself. Sure, I’ve talked about my wrath against Fucker’s stalkers, my fear of becoming Lord Vader, and my views on the tragedy of Cris Mendez, but I haven’t talked about the minute details of my currently monotonous life. Outside Twitter, that is. So what I’m going to do now is to bore you talk about what’s really going on with Baddie. But let me ask you first: Do you want it?!

When a man has too much time in his hands, he’s open to the idea of doing some of the most stupid things ever conceivable like, say, creating a Friendster account for his RAV 4. Yep. In April 2004, I had too much time in my hands and I created a Friendster account for Fucker, my black RAV 4. For 3 years, I added a select few of my friends to Fucker’s friends list. Some of them even took the initiative to add Fucker, and it’s all okay. They’re real friends, after all. But since a couple of weeks ago, Fucker started to get “friend requests” from, how should I describe them, unmistakable shoe-ins for Mike Villar’s Atrocities of Friendster? Yeah, that sounds about right. But I may be too harsh on these poor souls so I’ll ask you guys for guidance.

Exhibit A: Glendylle

Her profile says she’s 18, but I call shenanigans! She’s the one giving you the finger. I think. But just in case, mind your fucking manners, little missy!

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The last two installments of Facebook Dickery was all about good clean fun. Now, it’s time to get dirty! Time to be naughty! Time to unleash all your impurities! Behold, the My Purity Test app!

Are you a naughty little emo devil, a boring J-Pop starlet, or a pure-hearted angel on Earth (who might just be a transvestite)? You can determine that (yeah right) and more with this app. Let’s start with the Purity Profile:

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Okay, Janette Toral. You asked for it, YOU GOT IT!

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Last time, I talked about Facebook’s Photos application that lets you upload an unlimited number of photos. Sure, it’s a lot of fun to share photos of you naked in the crapper while puffing smoke, but there’s one Facebook app that let’s you create compelling images by hand: the Graffiti app. The concept is simple and very appealing:

Draw on your friends’ profiles! It’s fun.

See? It’s simple, yet it strongly appeals to your inner vandal. It gets more charming after you install the application and you’re presented with a few samples of art done using the app. Here’s a sample by Javier Sedillo:

Awesome, right? Wait, it gets awesomer.

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