Pick-up lines, even the funniest and most charming ones, never worked for me. Must be my creepy aura. Anyhoo, I’m wondering what pick-up lines superheroes are using to get some. Here’s what my perfectly normal and totally not perverse mind came up with:
Mr. Fantastic, Stretchy Leader of the Fantastic Four
Ask/Tell Baddie ANYTHING is a product of the current bandwagon in Tumblr wherein people create FormSpring forms or answerable text posts so other people can ask or tell them shit. It’s a fun way to interact with people on Tumblr and I’m telling you, I haven’t had this much fun since Twitter was still the new thing. Anyway, I unleashed my FormSpring form a couple of hours ago and I think it’s time to respond to the questions and the comments.
The very first response is from an anonymous source and this person asks “Did you know?” If you’re asking about that thing you did last summer, then yes. I do.
Internet hooligan Pau was second in line and this is what he has to say: “Why aren’t you a dick? I thought you liked dicks.” If you have seen my form, you’ll know that he’s being a clever dickhead. Man, what a dickhead.
Francis gives a nerdgeek salute with this message: “I know how much you like those Comic-Con babes and I know you’re a Green Lantern fanboy as well. Here ya go. You can thank me later. MORE POWER!” I’m thanking you now, fellow nerdgeek. I’m thanking you HARD.
Someone called BaddieLove asks “Baddie? Why are you so awesome?” Well, BaddieLove, because there’s nothing worse in life than being NOT awesome. Strong high five 7 times! *BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM KA-BOOOOOOM!*
Looks like I’m on a one-post-per-three-weeks schedule with these reviews. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing, and I don’t want to spend a whole paragraph on figuring it out. So let’s get right on to the reviews.
Secret Six #1: I enjoyed The Six’s guest appearance in Birds of Prey so much back when Gail Simone was still writing that series, I decided to check out their first ever ongoing. It’s now on my pull list. I guess I just got to have a Gail Simone book in there at all times (I dropped Wonder Woman because it just wasn’t working out for me).
Before we get into the reviews, here’s a short message from Dr. Doom:
DOOM: Behold! The new Emperor of Twitter: VICTOR VON DOOM! Follow DOOM on Twitter lest you feel his wrath! DOOM COMMANDS IT!
Thank you, Mr. Emperor of Twitter. Now, on to the reviews!
Uncanny X-Men #500 – I had great expectations for this issue, and that probably explains why I’m disappointed. Maybe there was just too much going on and it felt like an extra-sized preview book. Maybe it’s the distracting art. I don’t know. Don’t get me wrong, I love Terry Dodson’s art and I don’t hate Greg Land’s “lightbox style”, but they just don’t mix, is all I’m saying.
I just want to say to all of you sweet couples walking around holding hands, looking at each other with intense passion as if the rest of the world doesn’t exist, I hate you. You guys suck! Also, Happy Valentine’s Day!
*** You probably know by now that Baddie loves you. Now check out Face Rockery to see what Batman thinks of you.
