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Okay, Janette Toral. You asked for it, YOU GOT IT!
So I was just minding my own business stalking hot chicks on Friendster, right? After viewing hot bikini photos and taking mental pictures (to be “mentally Photoshopped” later), I checked out the bulletin board to see if I can find incriminating and juicy facts about my friends who answer stupid “surveys”. My mind wasn’t ready for what was about to be revealed to me: THE AWESOMEST TRUTH IN THE HISTORY OF ALL AWESOME TRUTHS!
Behold! The truth about Warcraft III: Defense of the Ancients (no modifications made to protect the integrity *LOL* of the text):
The Atari 2600, the video game console that popularized the use of microprocessor-based hardware and game cartridges, was released in October 1977 and peaked in popularity in the mid-80’s. It was officially retired in January 1992, giving it a lifespan of 14 years and 2 months, the longest in US home video game console history. Due to its significant impact on video game and consumer electronics history, plus the added value of nostalgia, many people not only still play this console, but they also make homebrew games. Of course, we know these people fail to win the one game that really matters: the “Get a Life!”game. ZING! With that lame intro out of the way, I present to you my own homebrew games:
A gang of KKK members stole Mr. T’s bling-blings and it’s up to you to help him track down the suckas and retrieve his precious loot! No pity fo’ those fools in Blingstravaganza with Mr. T!
I don’t have the time to play all my Playstation 2 games these days, due to the fact that I’m slowly regaining my social life. But I can still remember a couple of months ago that my life revolved around work, driving to and from work, eating, sleeping, reading comics, and playing games on my PS2. And during that time, I had a few favorites that deprived me of much wanted sleep. And here they are:
#5: Rumble Roses - I love pro-wrestling. I love hot women. Although I would prefer to wrestle hot women, I’m happy with making (and sometimes just watching) them wrestle half-naked in a wrestling ring or a puddle of mud. Call me a perv if you want, but I think this game is genius! I mean, come on. I wasn’t surprised that it got a sequel even though there’s nothing special about its gameplay. It’s all about the hot busty ladies doing mind-boggling moves to each other.
#4: X-Men Legends 2: Rise of Apocalypse - I wasn’t able to play the original X-Men Legends game, and this one made me regret it. It’s fairly obvious that I’m a comic book geek, so seeing a bunch of X-Men characters move around and speak using awesome voices is already heaven for me. Add to that an addicting gameplay and an open-ended story, and voila! Mutant magic at the palm of my hands.
Several hours to go before I get off work. Problem is there’s no work to be done. I’m bored. I’m tired of going to the smoking area to smoke because of the non-smokers who stay there and give me menacing stares. Jerks. I’ve visited all interesting websites and blogs I know of (that are non-porn in nature), and I’m too lazy to explore new ones. Already read all new messages in all the forums I visit. Already reached my daily limit of people to piss off (and on). Already finished with stalking all the stalkables on my Friendster friends list. What’s a bored retard to do? More importantly, what would Jesus do?! Play Kingdom of Loathing, of course!
Kingdom of Loathing is a browser-based multiplayer role playing game that can only be described effectively when you’re drunk and nobody’s listening. The writing is humorous, filled with wit and parody. The graphics… well, two words: stick figures.
