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The #1 zombie stripper attraction of an underground strip club uses her zombie vagina to shoot ping pong and billiard balls at her rival zombie stripper who uses a dance pole to hit said projectiles towards the superstar zombie stripper’s zombie face. It’s a back and forth battle of zombie wits and zombie ingenuity. (boobies blurred for you prudes out there)

Nudity, zombies, Jenna Jameson, balls, and gore. You just can’t argue with the resulting greatness.

*** This great moment in film history is from the elegantly named movie, Zombie Strippers.

Seeking vengeance (which is, really, the best reason ever to do anything) for the death of her mother, a sorta hot high school girl, with a vagina that has teeth that looks like a combination of eel and shark teeth, has sex with her stepbrother who is a total asshole. Her vagina bites off said asshole’s penis and it falls to the floor. The asshole’s dog then eats the bloody male sex organ. Hilarity ensues.

With intense penis-chomping and penis-eating action, this scene earns its spot in film history greatness.

*** This great moment in film history is from the movie with bite, Teeth.

A Japanese school girl with a machine gun arm (later replaced with a chainsaw arm) makes her last stand against the remaining members of a ninja Yakuza family that killed her brother and her friends. All is going well until the matriarch of the family unleashes her ultimate weapon, the Drill Bra, which she uses to grind the school girl’s ample breasts.

It is rare to see such an awesome combination of brutal, bloody action and thinly veiled lesbian suggestiveness. Clearly, this is a wellspring of greatness. One awesome scene in a tapestry of awesomeness in the form of a movie made of WIN.

*** This great moment in film history is from the blood-drenched movie, The Machine Girl.