— Originally published in facerockery.bigbaddie.com. —
The past week was tiring and full of bizarre moments. I was so busy and distracted that I didn’t get to finish reading my new comics until early Saturday, almost 2 days after I bought them. Crazy. Anyhoo, here comes teh reviews!
Annihilation: Conquest – Starlord #2: See that cover? Yeah. There’s a space raccoon pointing a gun at your face. THERE’S. A. SPACE. RACCOON. POINTING. A. GUN. AT. YOUR. FACE. Awesome. And that’s just the cover.
In the previous issue, we were introduced to a collection of weird C-list space characters that would make up Starlord’s ragtag team on a suicide mission. This issue, we get to see them in glorious action. You really get the feeling that these characters are expendable, and you also find yourself caring for them. This is the best of all four Annihilation: Conquest books so far and I love it. In fact, I’m cuddling with it right now.
Also, R.I.P. Deathcry. We hardly knew ye.
Astonishing X-Men #22: Holy crap! An issue of “Astonishing X-Men”! It’s like seeing a hot friend you haven’t seen for a long time. You still think that she’s hot, interesting, funny and sweet. You’re anxious to find out what she’s been up to but you realize it’s been too long since your last talk and now she feels like a total stranger. That’s what reading this feels like.
There’s a lot of cool dialogue but not enough awesome moments. Or maybe the irregular shipping schedule killed the book’s momentum. I dunno. All I know is that when Joss Whedon‘s run is over, I’ll re-read everything from the start. It’ll be an awesome read. But right now, reading AXM is just getting more painful with every issue. Sad, sad.
Birds of Prey #109: I gotta say, Tony Bedard‘s first issue of his run on the Birds is actually good. Sure, I miss Gail Simone‘s wicked wordplay and interesting references, but all the other good stuff are still there. There’s still drama and action, not to mention some fun wisecracking between the characters.
Nicola Scott is getting better with every issue. She draws two naked hot lesbians in bed without being sleazy. And that one-page splash of Knockout is simply awesome. It seems the transition of writers went smoothly for the Birds and Ms. Scott. I think I might stick around for a while.
Also, R.I.P. Knockout. We hardly knew you and your hot lesbian ways.
The Immortal Iron Fist #8: There’s not a lot of face-kicking here, save for a few in the flashback scenes featuring Iron Fist’s daddy. Oh, and there’s the fat guy who decimated weird-looking dudes in black with his sumo thunder stomp. That’s it.
This feels like the quiet before the storm of kung fu punches and lightning fast kicks to the groin. For the lack of ass-kickery, it makes up with introspective looks into the life of Iron Fist’s father and a little explanation on the nature of the 7 Capital Cities of Heaven. It’s all good, but I hope next time it’ll be more noisy.
The Order #2: “Oh my god, y’all! I’m fightin’ a bear!” That’s the line of the week, ladies and gentlemen, and it was delivered by a hot blonde who seems to be squeaky clean on the outside, but is hiding something appalling on the inside. Becky, codenamed “Aralune”, seems to be the poster child of tragic hot blonde teenagers. Beauty queen pretty smiles on the outside, sex video dirty secrets on the inside. Also, she turned into a giant jellyfish and absorbed a 20-kiloton nuclear blast, which makes her the awesomest character ever.
It seems the hype is true. Matt Fraction and Barry Kitson are firing on all cylinders and making sure that this book will be one of 2007’s best new titles. I mean, with a hot teenage blonde chick fighting a bear, you have to be.
Thunderbolts #116: There’s a certain contrast between the Thunderbolts and The Order that makes me believe that when the two teams get to fight each other, or team up, it’s gonna be on like Saigon.
Warren Ellis, I believe, is the ultimate manipulator. He manipulates me into uncontrollably turning the pages like a hungry detective searching for a truth burger. What? Whatever. I just get sucked in to the panels and I keep on reading until I realize there aren’t any pages left and I have to wait one month before I get my next fix. I hate you, Ellis! And Mike Deodato too!
X-Men #202: I should really be enjoying this book more than I actually am, but I’ll always be distracted by the abstract-esque pencils of Humberto Ramos. Hey Marvel, let him just do some of the All Ages books you have. Kids will dig his style. I, on the other hand, am getting pretty annoyed by staying on panels longer than I have to just to understand what’s really going on there. Geebus Cries.
I guess I’m hating the art more than I’m loving the writing. I was extremely excited when the Marauders started kicking the X-Men’s collective ass a couple of issues ago, but I’m getting too pissed off with the art that I’m slowly losing interest in Mike Carey‘s story. Man, this is the second X-Men book that disappointed me this week. Good thing there’s…
X-Men: First Class #3: Yep, Jeff Parker and Roger Cruz save the week for the X-Men in another fun issue of “X-Men: First Class”.
The fun starts at the very first page which usually acts as recap page for most Marvel books. The “recap” page features the “Decrees from the Republic of Bobby Land”, which is hella funny. The fun continues with Xavier’s first five students encountering mole men, traversing Monster Island using a giant monster as transportation, and watching Mastermind and Prof. X engage in a giant head fight. The awesome issue ends with a cute short story by Parker with Colleen Coover on art. It more than makes up for the X-disappointments of the week. Yay for Parker, Cruz, and Coover!
Face-Rocking Panel of the Week: From The Order #2…
You’re not just punching a bear in the face, babe. You’re punching a bear with a jetpack in the face. That’s a 20 on the “That’s frickin’ awesome!” meter, and it only goes up to 10!