— Originally published in facerockery.bigbaddie.com. —
Every week, Baddie talks about his latest comics haul. For each comic, Baddie will give reasons why it rocks. The more reasons given, the more awesome the comic is. Fewer reasons mean the comic is just so-so or it’s terribly swimming in the sucktitude pool. Savvy? Good. Let’s rock!
Why Annihilation: Conquest – Wraith #1 rocks:
- This new “Wraith” character looks like a cross between DC’s Sandman and Lobo. Wrap your head around that.
- Wraith’s polymorphic weapon: Coolest. Weapon. Ever. Even cooler than Star Wars’ light saber.
- The Phalanx, who quarantined the entire Kree space, just got their asses handed to them by a space emo biker dude. Awesome.
- Ronan the Accuser, one of the heroes of the first Annihilation mini-series, is now under Phalanx control. And it seems he’s going Jack Bauer on Wraith’s ghostly ass next issue. KREE FIGHT!
- It’s solid start for the 4 Annihilation: Conquest mini-series. Next week: hot lesbian Quasar!
Why Green Lantern #21 rocks:
- Ivan Reis on pencils is teh awesome. That is all.
- John Stewart is one of the toughest sons of bitches in the universe. Dozens of Green Lanterns are bleeding, dying, or are already dead after the initial attack of the Sinestro Corps, but all Stewart can show for it is a slightly torn costume and a tiny bump on the forehead. Bad-ass.
- Blue midgets burns pages off a giant book of prophecies.
- The Sinestro Corps is kicking Green Lantern ass all over the universe, and their big guns haven’t even entered the fray yet. Yep, the Lanterns are screwed.
- The Central Power Battery got booby-trapped. John Stewart, Hal Jordan, and Guy Gardner? YOU GOT PUNK’D!!!
Why Justice Society of America #7 rocks:
- Citizen Steel is so strong, he can kill you just by hugging you.
- I can’t believe no one in the JSA hasn’t mentioned anything about Dr. Mid-Nite’s owl. I mean, he’s just perched on Mid-Nite’s shoulders, watching. He’s just staring at everybody. That’s just creepy.
- Hawkman loves his helmet so much, he keeps it on even when he’s wearing a soldering mask.
- Starman: “Aren’t you going to drink your milk?” Superman: “Um, no.” Starman: “It makes your bones stronger.” That Starman, what a nutjob.
- Superheroes versus Nazis: this is reason enough for this issue to rock.
- For the first time ever, I see Power Girl as a true team leader and not just a couple of D-cups talking.
- “Fists are nature’s problem solvers.” – Wildcat. This is the quote of the week, bar none.
- “Boo to Nazis!” – Stargirl. Quote-of-the-week first runner-up.
Why New Avengers #32 rocks:
- IT DOESN’T.
- Okay, to be fair to Brian Michael Bendis and Leinil Yu, there’s one thing that makes this issue rock, and that’s Spider-Woman kicking Wolverine’s ass. Again. Other than that, blah. I guess this is where I get off the New Avengers train. It’s off my pull list. Thanks for the decompressed memories, guys! Good luck with the whole Skrullaganza thingy.
Why Nova #4 rocks:
- You know that a comic book rocks when it’s first page features the title character shooting through a giant robot, causing an awesome explosion. In space.
- It’s the return of Gamora, the Deadliest Woman in the Galaxy. That alone is reason enough for total rockery, but there’s more. She’s been assimilated into the Phalanx collective. And she’s hot.
- Nova slams into the Phalanx barrier at warp speed. I can’t think of an awesome enough sound effect for that, and apparently, neither does the Nova creative team. The impact is so awesome, only dogs can read the sound effect.
- A hot new female Nova debuts. Is she permanently Nova, or just a temp? And what the hell happened to Richard Ryder?! Is he, you know, dead or something? Can’t wait for the next issue.
Why Punisher War Journal #9 rocks:
- I’ll never get tired of saying this: Ariel Olivetti‘s art is awesome.
- “Heil Hitler, y’all.”
- The new Hate-Monger calls Captain America a pig. You just know that the Punisher ain’t going to let that slide. Heck, even I was offended when I first read that line.
- Letting the Punisher bathing in H-Rays: bad idea if you’re a Nazi asshole.
- After being forced into beating up a woman, Frank Castle lets all the hate loose, starting with the poor dude whose head he introduced to a cactus. YEAH!!!
- Seeing the Punisher kill Nazis just gives me the happies. Tee-hee!
Why X-Factor #21 rocks:
- The way Peter David writes this book is just pure poetry. I love it.
- Pablo Raimondi is back, baby! He’s probably the best guy out there right now to draw awesome facial expressions. I hope he never leaves again. Ever.
- M is for “Monet”, but soon, it will probably stand for “Mommy”. That, in itself, is already an interesting and juicy hook for future X-Factor stories. But once you add the Endangered Species storyline into the equation, things just get a whole lot juicier.
- The truck hitting the Isolationist reminds me of the scene in the first Fantastic Four movie where the Thing stopped a truck on that bridge. It’s an awesome panel. God, I’m so glad Pablo Raimondi’s back.
- Rictor and Wolfsbane: SEXY TIME!!!
- “Drinking alone is better than not drinking at all.” – Madrox the Multiple Man. This is my new life motto.
If you take out New Avengers, it’s a perfect week of comics for me. But it’s not. So, yeah. Laters.