My iPod touch. Let me show you it.

In Technology by Gino Carteciano16 Comments

I let the world know about my desires for Christmas this year, and lo and behold, the world has granted me half of my two-item Christmas wish list (OK, not the world. The parental units. Thanks, Mom and Dad!) mere days before Christmas. I have now in my possession a totally awesome and totally shiny iPod touch. Let me show you it! First, the packaging:

ipod touch macy gray

It’s a tight little box made of sturdy stuff. I have perfume boxes bigger than this baby, and I fell in love with it immediately. See, I’d like to think of myself as a minimalist. That’s what makes me helplessly attracted to Apple products. In design terms, anyway. So, yeah. It got me at “Hello”.

ipod touch contents

Since it’s packaged in a compact bundle of awesome, it’s no surprise that there’s no huge manual included. No installation disc for iTunes either since they update that stupid annoying software like every couple of months or something. I say “stupid annoying” because iTunes has become a huge pain in the ass after I upgraded it to version 7.5. It doesn’t open, but Windows Task Manager says it’s running. This is a huge bummer since the touch‘s life depends on it. Literally. Long story short, the only gripe I have for now about the touch is it being iTunes’ bitch. Moving on…

ipod touch

So there it is. My shiny new toy. And being the retard that I am, I think it’s time to give it a name. Ladies and gentlemen, I would like you to meet…


Get it? “Molesto”? It’s an iPod touch? What do you mean “repulsive”?! You’re talking to a guy who named his car “Fucker”, buddy! So zip it. Anyhoo, Molesto‘s a pretty neat gadget. The main draw for this baby is the interface. Multi-touch display, yo! It’s fascinating and fun to just navigate through it even though it doesn’t really have groundbreaking applications.

ipod touch back side

I have little to no photography skillz, but I hope you can see the sexy reflection of my sexy camera (named “Clicky”) and my sexy hand on the sexy and shiny back side of Molesto. One thing that I hate about shiny objects is once I get a hold of them, I leave my fingerprints all over the place. Within seconds after I took Molesto out of the box, I’ve tarnished him with my oily hands. That’s where the polishing cloth included in the package comes in handy. Here’s another shot of Molesto’s back side, this time at an angle:

ipod touch back side

A shiny metal back side and a glass front side. What a fancy, this Molesto guy. I’m expecting to gain more friends as I flaunt this mighty fine gadget every chance I get. Because really, I’ve got nothing going for me since I’m a flabby summbitch. Cartman from Southpark is practically a caricature of myself. That fat bastard.

ipod touch cartman

And if you’re wondering why I didn’t talk about the features of this slim piece of awesome, I’d like to leave that to the experts. You don’t see “tech blog” anywhere on this page, do you? Right. So, yeah. I’ll listen to my collection of Porkchop Duo recordings now. BAI!



  1. Molesto. Whatta name for such a pretty lil thing.
    I shall hang out with you more often so I can plot to steal your new iPod. Yay!

  2. @Ade: I got it to run on my personal PC, which is liek ancient already. I used iTunes 7.4 because 7.5 is such a bitch.

    @Ria: Don’t be. There’s enough Baddie to go around. HUHLOLZ

    @Jewel: You have to realize, you don’t touch Molesto. Molesto touches YOU!

  3. @Niki: Dun hate the Baddie, hate the music playa. HUHLOLZ

    @Joiz: I used to not lust for an iPhone, but since the touch is basically an iPhone without the Phone and I’m loving its awesometasticity, I think I’m lusting for one now. Also, iTunes trouble resolved! I still hate it though. Hmf.

  4. I should have done this when I had that freakin cool player… no not just a player it's teh luuuurrrrvvve.

    But yeah not a many wow apps. =S

    Now I'm just waiting if I get holdup again or I break it and the phone I just bought so I could have more reasons to get an iPhonez!

    And since I haven't said anything insulting yet, HAHAHA to iTunes trouble! HAHAHA! there, uhm err… I flee now.

  5. @P-Dawg: 16GB. And that’s another thing that sorta sucks about the touch. That’s, like, not even half of my pron collection.

    @aLOLapenny: Is your mom hot? I KEED! Hater.

  6. I. HATE. YOU. My parents wont even buy me a decent meal at McDonald's and yours got you an iPOD touch. Wanna trade? Please?

  7. Pingback: Five Things I Want to Have in 2008 -- Baddieverse

  8. Pingback: I Had HappySlip in the Palm of My Hand Before Rambo Melted My Face -- Baddieverse

  9. Pingback: Be My Santa DOOM? | Baddieverse

  10. Between me and my husband we've owned extra MP3 players over time than I can rely, together with Sansas, iRivers, iPods (classic & touch), the Ibiza Rhapsody, etc. However, the previous few years I've settled down to 1 line of players. Why? Because I used to be pleased to discover how well-designed and enjoyable to make use of the underappreciated (and broadly mocked) Zunes are.

  11. Pingback: My Top 10 Essential iPod Touch Apps | Baddieverse


This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.