Chuck Norris vs. Your Mom

Chuck Norris vs. Yo Momma!

Gino Carteciano General Dickery 11 Comments

Ever wondered who’s more awesome between Chuck Norris and your mom? Well wonder no more!

CHUCK NORRIS VS. YOUR MOM

Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Yo momma so fat outer space thinks they’re made for each other.

Advantage: Yo momma

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Yo momma so lazy all she does is sleep and wait.

Advantage: Chuck Norris

The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.

Yo momma so fat she doesn’t feel anything, even pain caused by Chuck Norris.

Advantage: Yo momma

Guns don’t kill people. Chuck Norris kills people.

Yo momma kills people’s boners.

Advantage: Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk, and Kill.

Yo momma has two speeds: Sleep, and Devour.

Advantage: Chuck Norris

The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer.

Yo momma so ugly people choose to die by Chuck Norris’ fists instead of seeing her.

Advantage: DRAW

Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

Yo momma so stupid she buys ice cream from Chuck Norris.

Advantage: Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Yo momma so fat Waldo decided to hide in her chin.

Advantage: Yo momma

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Yo momma so fat, when Chuck Norris ran around her, he couldn’t punch himself in the back of the head.

Advantage: Yo momma

Chuck Norris counted to infinity… twice.

Yo momma so stupid she tried to count backwards from infinity.

Advantage: Chuck Norris

With a score of 5-4, I guess now we know who’s more awesome – CHUCK NORRIS.

CHUCK NORRIS WINS

Comments 11

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  3. @Steel: Why are you naked in your wor… never mind. Don't wanna know.

    @Prudence: Wait til you see HER momma.

    @Helga: WHAT?! SPEAK LOUDER! I CAN"T HEAR YOU OVER THE CLAPPING!

  4. Hey!! Here is some of my favorite yo momma jokes:

    Yo mama's glasses are so thick she can see into the future.
    Yo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends.
    Yo momma’s so fat, her drivers license says, “ Picture continued on other side.”

    You should totally come check out this new site, http://yomomma.tv/ – you can battle other people with your yo momma jokes and even tell them how whack their jokes are.

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  6. Pingback: Chuck Norris vs. Yo Momma Round 2 -- Baddieverse

  7. Very nice jokes, chek out this list of yo mama jokes

    Yo mama is so fat when she steps on a scale it says, One at a time please

    Yo mama is so fat when she walks the radio skips

    Your mom so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone

    Your mama is so fat when she walks the radio skips

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