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Dear Countries Who Ratified the Outer Space Treaty,

Greetings of love and peace! AND RAW EVIL! I am Baddie, and I am considering taking on a life of crime. I haven’t thought of a kick-ass super-villain name yet, but I’m getting there. Anyway, I just want to know how much trouble I’ll get myself into if I violate Article IV of the Outer Space Treaty that states…

States Parties to the Treaty undertake not to place in orbit around the Earth any objects carrying nuclear weapons or any other kinds of weapons of mass destruction, install such weapons on celestial bodies, or station such weapons in outer space in any other manner.

See, I have this diabolical plan to develop something called The Insanely Intense Death Ray of Pain that I shall install on the moon’s surface. I want to know how much resistance I can expect from you guys. Don’t get any ideas, though. You can only slow me down. Eventually, I will claim the moon as my own and on it, my Insanely Intense Death Ray of Pain will rise! YOU CAN’T STOP MY VILLAINY!

Sincerely,
Your Future Awesome Arch-Nemesis, Baddie

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Less than 2 years ago, Pluto was demoted to being a dwarf planet. I covered the reactions of the other planets after the shocking demotion. Now, it’s time that we check up on the ex-planet. It’s time for us to go Behind the Planet, or should I say, the dwarf planet. Snapz!

After Pluto was expelled from our solar system’s planetary club, life went on for the remaining 8 planets. Jupiter proceeded to brag about his awesome Great Red Spot, Mercury continued with his eccentric orbit around the Sun, and Earth stayed blue and pretty. Business as usual. Pluto, however, went on to follow a lonely dark path to deep depression.

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Yes, after several years of failed attempts at controlling fire, I’ve finally done it! I always knew I was special. Mutant special. And now that I’ve discovered my previously latent mutant pyrokinetic ability, I’m wondering if I have other superhuman powers. I’m determined to find out, and I believe I can discover the truth with the help of my trusty old friend, SCIENCE!

You should know that there’s no one better in utilizing SCIENCE! than me. I’m a frickin’ scientist! I mean, I graduated with a Bachelor of SCIENCE! degree in Computer SCIENCE! I have a piece of paper to prove it! And seriously, you just can’t argue with a piece of paper. Sure, it took me 7 years to finish the damn course, but still.

So, without further ado, here’s my short quest in finding out if I have other awesome abilities… using SCIENCE!

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It was bound to happen. The Man Blog, oozing with ROCKiness and ROCKtitude, presents the ROCKtacular Banana Gangbang Rock Festival! Be there on May 3rd at Bela Bar, Greenhills for this balls-busting, world-shattering, face-melting, death-defying ROCK thingy!

In the immortal words of ancient wise men, “For those about to rock, we salute you!” OK that was weak. See you there, k?

P.S. Please don’t say anything mean about the poster lest you hurt my sensitive frustrated graphic artist feelings.

So, the Vatican has introduced seven new deadly sins. Do they have a committee that decides this kind of shit or something? The Committee of Sins, perhaps? Anyway, these new deadly sins (Genetic Modification, Experimenting on Humans, Polluting the Environment, Causing Social Injustice, Causing Poverty, Becoming Obscenely Wealthy, and Taking Drugs) are more hip than the original seven, and it doesn’t sit well with the old guys.

Pride: We were the first! Why do we need another seven?! We were the stars of a Brad Pitt movie, goddammit!

Wrath: DIE, N00BS! DIE!!!

Lust: Fakers. We can totally kick their pretentious asses. Mmmm… asses. Gangbang, anyone?

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