Browsing articles from "February, 2010"
Wanted: Valentine’s Day Sweetheart
Must be 18-30 years old and female. Preferably single. And hot.
Must be willing to be called “Sweetheart” while sharing a story book romance with a dick like me.
I want your love and I want your revenge. You and me could write a Baddie romance.
Must be aware that “shits” and “stuffs” are not the plural forms of “shit” and “stuff”, respectively.
Must be able to look past my unpleasant exterior, as well as my pungent aroma.
Must understand and accept the fact that I am not a dog person. I like cats, though. Because they’re hilarious.
Must be comfortable with awkward silences because, believe me, there will be a lot of that. I am the master of awkward silences. THE MASTER!
