Monster Tribute Week: Vampires

This entry is part 4 of 5 in the series Monster Tribute Week

We can’t have a Halloween theme week here on Baddieverse without vampires, can we? No. No, we can’t. I promise I won’t make “Vampires suck!” jokes. Also, Twilight references.

vampires

A toast to the fanged ones! You have taught me a lot in this life, including lessons on being a gentleman (so the ladies can be more open to the idea of me sucking the life out of them) and counting. Thank you, Sesame Street’s The Count!

I spent years believing that I was one of you due to the fact that I hated the sun, I was more comfortable being awake at night and I was convinced that I can control people’s minds by talking slowly and squinting. Those years are behind me now, but I would very much like to live like that again. Those were awesome years.

Your ability to turn into mist is something that I terribly desire. I mean, come on.

To the legendary bloodsuckers! I shall suck the blood of hot virgins in your honor!


2 Responses to “Monster Tribute Week: Vampires”

  1. you're forgetting something: Vampires have been gay-fied by TWILIGHT.

    Vampires, they sparkle now so that birds could claw on them. They don't turn to bats anymore, Edward Cullen will not sparkle as much if he were turned into a bad.

  2. [...] apparent reason. So fuck you too, Firestorm. And let it be known that in comics, I only love Marvel vampires. Marvel Dracula is the shit, [...]

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