A Special Blog Action Day Message from Cobra Commander

cobra commander

Greetings, future Cobra slaves!

Today, on this so-called Blog Action Day, I, Cobra Commander, demand that you cease killing this planet at once! Your collective inefficient and indulgent lifestyle is promoting climate change, slowly poisoning Earth. This will not stand! You need to start cleaning up your act. You can start at home or at your pathetic workplace. Ask your so-called “leaders” to take action. Do little things that will pay dividends in the future. Our future (as master and slaves). There are plenty of resources online that can give you ideas on how to live Green. Take a break from YouTube videos of dudes smashing their balls with baseball bats for a couple of hours and start researching on how you can help, you lazy assbags.

As you know, it’s only a matter of time before I completely conquer the world. I will not rule over a dead planet! I need beautiful and serene orchards where my sex slaves can play! I need polar regions teeming with life where I can exile my enemies! I need clean air so I can, you know, live longer and shit. I need a healthy empire! A clean kingdom! A LIVING PLANET. What you’re doing now is doing damage to my future plans of grand conquest. You’re ruining my dream of a majestic future (for myself and my 70 hot young wives)! You probably know that your days as my slaves are fast approaching, that’s why you’re consciously killing Earth. SABOTAGE! I will not tolerate your scorched earth tactics!


Cobra Commander
Future Emperor of Earth

Note: Cobra Commander is in no way affiliated with Blog Action Day or Change.org. AS FAR AS YOU KNOW.

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11 Responses to “A Special Blog Action Day Message from Cobra Commander”

  1. [...] published a “message from the Cobra Commander”: As you know, it’s only a matter of time before [...]

  2. Massa P says:

    That was pure awesome.

  3. Arbet says:

    The mask == AWESOME! Where can I get one?

  4. Tonyo Cruz says:

    This is perhaps one of the best posts today.

  5. dementia says:

    I am now traumatized by the photo

  6. kenna says:

    This is cool!

  7. L.A. says:

    Roger, commander.

  8. Baddie says:

    @Arbet: Only future emperors of Earth can get one, sry2say.

    @dementia: You should see MY version of that photo.

    @Massa P, Tonyo and Kenna, thanks! Cobra Commander is pleased.

  9. Mara says:

    Where is the button to like this post?

  10. Baddie says:

    @L.A.: Carry on!

    @Mara: Nasa puso mo.

  11. ecoboy says:

    Awesome. I'm actually hearing Cobra Commander's voice as I read the entry.

    The Commander should REALLY cut back on carbs.

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