Ask/Tell Baddie ANYTHING is a product of the current bandwagon in Tumblr wherein people create FormSpring forms or answerable text posts so other people can ask or tell them shit. It’s a fun way to interact with people on Tumblr and I’m telling you, I haven’t had this much fun since Twitter was still the new thing. Anyway, I unleashed my FormSpring form a couple of hours ago and I think it’s time to respond to the questions and the comments.

The very first response is from an anonymous source and this person asks “Did you know?” If you’re asking about that thing you did last summer, then yes. I do.

Internet hooligan Pau was second in line and this is what he has to say: “Why aren’t you a dick? I thought you liked dicks.” If you have seen my form, you’ll know that he’s being a clever dickhead. Man, what a dickhead.

Francis gives a nerdgeek salute with this message: “I know how much you like those Comic-Con babes and I know you’re a Green Lantern fanboy as well. Here ya go. You can thank me later. MORE POWER!” I’m thanking you now, fellow nerdgeek. I’m thanking you HARD.

Someone called BaddieLove asks “Baddie? Why are you so awesome?” Well, BaddieLove, because there’s nothing worse in life than being NOT awesome. Strong high five 7 times! *BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM KA-BOOOOOOM!*

“Would you have anal sex or kill Johnny Depp?” I would kill Depp for less. What’s wrong with you, anonymous person?

“Go to Comic-Con for free or lifetime supply of ring pops?” 4 days of geekgasm or diabetes? Please.

“Would you kill 200 pandas to bring back Michael Jackson?” If those are zombie pandas, yes. Also, MJ must go back as Jackson 5 MJ, not Cryptkeeper MJ.

Some sweet anonymous soul says “I love reading your blog :)” and all I can say is THANK YOU. And LET’s MAKE OUT.

Someone asks “Who’s your real Tumblr crush? Not the one whom you ‘liked’ post the most. Y’know, your REAL crush?” Well, Gossip Girl/Guy, since I’m so high school, I’m not saying. What I can tell you though is she’s also my Twitter crush, my Plurk crush, my Multiply crush and my Facebook crush. ♥ ♥ ♥ *giggles*

Sorbiebabieee says “CUTE BEAR!” so I BEARHUG YOU TIGHT, SORBIEBABIEEEEE!

Ukay-Ukay, one of my favorite Tumblrers (Tumblrists?) gave me 10 match ups and she wants me to pick the winners. My pleasure. Winners are in bold:

1. edward cullen and edward scissorhands
2. 7 smurfs and the 7 dwarves (The smurfs are, what, 6 inches tall?)
3. skeletor and hordak
4. brad pitt in fight club and brad pitt in troy
5. heath ledger’s joker or jack nicholson’s joker (This is a tough one but I pick Ledger. Because he’s dead.)
6. rocky or manny pacquiao
7. edward cullen and lestat
8. edward cullen and blade
9. edward cullen and buffy
10. buffy and blade (I say this is a tie.)

I’m sorry if I didn’t explain some of my picks in detail, but here’s the gist: the winners are awesome.

Steel, Satanist and rapist of orphans with cancer, wants to know: “How am I supposed to know you answered or even read this question?” That’s easy, Steel ol’ chum. MAGIC.

Here’s an interesting trivia: Most of the submissions came from Helga. She went on and on about being a virgin, wanting to marry chicks, reading poker faces, her being Billie Jean’s lover, and other really important stuff. What a tool.

Someone called PJ gets clever with this message: “I was wondering about the….oh wait…you like bears!? Like these bears?” What a comedian, this guy.

Now here’s a really profound question from someone clever called Goodie: “What is the circumference of a moose?” Easy. It’s the pie are squared of a moose. I’m not a stupid. Duh.

A curious cat wants to know how long is my schlong. I don’t really pay attention, but you can ask your mom. BA DA BISH!

Someone called Cy (probably Pau or Steel) asks “Would you spend the rest of your life with me? :)” Well Cy, let’s talk about this over beer. Facebook me.

My buddy Ade wants to know “How much money does it take for you to strut around Ortigas Avenue while wearing a bear costume and touching the boobies of random females?” I TOLD YOU, MAN! WE’LL TALK ABOUT THIS OFFLINE!

And finally, Moki asks “Does Moki still suck? Do you still hate her? LOL” And my answer is YES. I hate you for opening my eyes. For making me realize that there’s this sophisticated beauty that has always been there right in front of me all along. I HATE YOU WITH A PASSION! I’m kidding. Heh.

I can never hate any of you guys. Thank you for participating in this online exercise of retardery. You guys are FULL OF WIN!