It’s the last day of February. The last day of Love Month. There’s only one appropriate way to end this shit and it’s to bastardize a classic song. Apologies to Willie Nelson and Julio Iglesias, the lyric writers of To All the Girls I’ve Loved Before.

To all the girls I’ve loved before
Who slammed my face to the door
My nose got hurt the most
so I dedicate this post
To all the girls I’ve loved before

To all the girls I once caressed
And can I just say I’ve held the loveliest breasts
For giving me awesome jobs of blow
I owe a lot I know
To all the girls I’ve loved before

My sexy time sense is tingling
And every time with my hand I play
I see you girls when I’m dreaming
Every single lonely day

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Love Month is almost over and I just realized “How can I talk about Love without talking about the Internet?!” I mean, the Internet is not only the source of unlimited information and porn, but it’s also the wellspring of happiness, and that’s what we’re all looking for, right?

Every time I feel miserable, I look for friends who I can talk to. Seeing that I don’t have a lot of friends in real life, I usually just turn to the Internet for comfort and a few LOLs. These are the Internet’s greatest gifts to me:

PANDA WHO’S WILLING TO LET YOU TAKE ALL THE BAMBOO YOU WANT

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It’s normal during this time of year to look for love anywhere we think we can find it. Whether it’s the usual places where tired hearts thread or the strangest places where the quirkiest minds convene. In my case, it’s both.

I went to the last couple of nights of the UPLB Feb Fair and I looked for love. Like always, I found it all around me.

I looked upon lovers and the glimmer in their eyes as they celebrated Valentine’s Day in each other’s arms. The most common way to find love.

I looked upon old friends. I realized that I still have a lot of those. I met new friends too. Someday I hope to look upon them with as much glee as I have upon seeing my old ones. I may have met future lovers as well, but it’s too early to tell. How exciting.

I looked upon the old places I used to frequent. Campus buildings, restaurants, bars, apartments, parking lots, roads, patches of grass, and dark corners. All reminded me of how I loved staying in the university and how I love coming back to visit.

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It’s the big V-Day, the end of our Valentine’s Week. I decided to do another double take, and this time, it’s an evil double take.

And here’s the variant, something a little less retarded than the other BaddiE-CARDS I published this week:

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Yet another one of those things.