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To open this totally fabulous Mean Girls Week, I think it’s just appropriate that we start with a review of the Mean Girls DVD. Yes, I got weird looks when I bought it. No, I’m not gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that). I’m just an admirer of this often misjudged modern classic based on a self-help book for parents with no narrative whatsoever. Also, I have a thing for hot girls in pink.

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Let’s face it. We live in a world where child molesters are in every corner. They’re in the playgrounds. They’re in the schools. They’re in the churches. They’re in our homes. They’re on the Internet, Facebooking and MySpacing your sweet, innocent, adorable little angels. And let’s not get started with serial killers and people who are itching to sell your children’s kidney in the black market for avant garde culinary douchebags to turn into Chinese soup.

We need to be mindful of our children’s whereabouts at all times, by any means necessary. Question is, are we really willing to go through these means? Would you go through any length to protect your child? Would you go as far as putting a GPS tracking device on your precious sons and daughters?

I would.

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Keep your PMS shield handy. Make sure your can of drama repellent is full. Pack your bags, take a deep breath, and watch your back, we’re going to Girl World!

Next week is Mean Girls Week here on Baddieverse. Monday through Friday. One post each day. It’s all about the Plastics and the peons living in their world, baby! Like, totally.

It was bound to happen. The Man Blog, oozing with ROCKiness and ROCKtitude, presents the ROCKtacular Banana Gangbang Rock Festival! Be there on May 3rd at Bela Bar, Greenhills for this balls-busting, world-shattering, face-melting, death-defying ROCK thingy!

In the immortal words of ancient wise men, “For those about to rock, we salute you!” OK that was weak. See you there, k?

P.S. Please don’t say anything mean about the poster lest you hurt my sensitive frustrated graphic artist feelings.

Ahh, yes. April Fools’ Day. A day of hoaxes and practical jokes unleashed upon the weak-minded and the gullible. A time for merriment and dickeries. But can we learn anything from all this mischief? I believe we can because I did.

Before I share the lessons I’ve learned on April Fools’ Day, let me tell you about the pranks I pulled for this most glorious of days:

Prologue: BADDIE JOKES PRACTICALLY!

Pre-2003, I was constantly playing practical jokes on my friends and family. From farting in front of my sister’s face, to tripping a friend who was running really, really, really fast, I’ve done it all. But nothing a few words of apology can’t fix. Then I sort of grew up. Sure, there’s the occasional Dumping a Pail of Water on Someone Just for Kicks gag, but I got over my Extremely Annoying Prankster phase early in college. But I just couldn’t resist. I decided to take it up a notch. I was ready for some mind games!

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