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Dear Mr. Technology,
Hi. I’m Gino Carteciano and I’m a big fan. In fact, I took up Computer Science as a sign of my devotion to you. I’ve been mostly happy with you and your almost magical wonders, but recently, I’ve been getting harassed by your failures that are quite simply irritating and frustrating. I think I’m starting to hate you and everything closely related to you. Well, except the Bionic Woman.
But other than her, yeah. I hate every piece of you right now. Want to know why? Let me just enumerate your recent failings in making my life enjoyable and easy:
My car stereo.
I know it’s old, but why do you have to take away the joy of music from me? It’s the only thing that keeps me sane during daily 2-hour drives from home to work and back! But no worries, it’s now replaced with a new stereo and it’s boomin’, yo!
My office Mac.
It seems every week, it’s getting slower and slower. What the hell’s up with that? How can I be a pretentious Mac user if all I can brag about it is… well… it’s not a Windows machine. Also, I’ve been seeing the Beach Ball of Death so much (like, every 30 seconds?) that I’ve been having dreams about it. In slow mo.
iTunes.
It just stopped working. Actually, it just stopped opening. I uninstalled and re-installed it (and Quicktime too) multiple times to no avail. But it is a silver lining. Because iTunes is no longer working on our PC, I went back to my first media player love, WinAmp. It has grown into a tight, sexy app since I last used it, which was years ago. Me likey. I still hate you for iTunes, though.
And finally, our PLDT MyDSL connection at home.
Is it too much to ask to have a week of accessing the Internet without our connection dying every few minutes? I mean, really. I can manage with slow connections, but random disconnections that can last up to an hour?! Christ. No wonder a lot of bloggers have obligatory “PLDT Sucks!” blog posts. Also, I counted at least 3 4 5 disconnections while I was writing this post. FIVE!!!
I know it’s ironic that I’m airing my concerns using some of the tools you gave me, but come on. Cut me some slack. The only reason why I’m not appending “TECHNOLOGY SUCKS BALLS!” to the titles of my blog posts is you haven’t screwed with my DVD watching habits yet. If you do, I swear to all that’s holy I’m gonna kick you in the face. WITH MY FISTS!
That is all. God bless and happy holidays!
Yours in illegally downloading MP3s,
Gino Carteciano a.k.a. Baddie
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Well, you know how Mr. Technology works. He gives you totally unbelievable blessing, most of which are too good to be true. Once you’re dependent on said blessings, he screws you up. In the ass. And nose. And tearducts. Thrice.
I’m still thanking Mr. Technology for not only the bionic woman, but for Kristanna Loken as well.
Awe, don’t feel bad, Mike Mohede. Even though you didn’t bag the Asian Idol title, you’re still a good singer since the performance ni—–
Wait a sec… this ain’t Mike. It’s Bad—
Sorry. Wrong website. lolz!!!!111one
@Ade: Whew! Good thing he doesn’t screw me in the mouth. Because that would be gross.
@Frosti: Don’t you mean Ahnlud?
@Neil: Didn’t I ban you from the Internets? I BAN YOU AGAIN!!!!11
lols @ "Mike Mohede"
The itunes thingy happened to me to. Stupid apple updates. What I did was googled for older versions and installed a working one.
If not for Mr. Technology, I wouldn’t have a job. Then again, I wouldn’t have an obsession with blogging, either.
@dementia: I’ll try that approach. Thanks!
@Beth: We’re on the same boat. My job revolves around Mr. Technology. I still hate him, though. Well, it’s more of a love-hate thing.
I CAN’T READ!
Good thing I decided to stop using computers years ago. Yep, I’m reading your blog and posting my comment via voodoo.
Bionic woman! Uhm.. what was the topic again? Oh yeah.
Beach ball looks more like a lollipop to me hehehe
and oh noes, ‘PLDT is teh suck’ topic again! Which is why I’ve resorted to stealing Wifi for a living.
If it weren’t for technology, I’d be dead by now, but if it weren’t for him too I wouldn’t have jumped in front of that armored truck in the first place.
Now back to being a net vagabond…
What is this beach ball of death and why is it so pretty unlike us Windows users’s BSOD?
@Pau: So I guess you can’t read this - YOUR FACE IS GAY!!!
@Steel: Voodoo is, like, sooo 2006. Get with the times, man. Tibetan Out-of-Body Experience is where it’s at.
@Joiz: Yeah! Bionic Woman! I’m sorry, what was your comment again?
@Helga: It’s sort of the equivalent of the stupid hour glass in Windows. Only it appears more often if your Mac is as slow as retarded molasses.
Oh.
I dont have an hourglass, though. I have a UNICORN!