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When a man has too much time in his hands, he’s open to the idea of doing some of the most stupid things ever conceivable like, say, creating a Friendster account for his RAV 4. Yep. In April 2004, I had too much time in my hands and I created a Friendster account for Fucker, my black RAV 4. For 3 years, I added a select few of my friends to Fucker’s friends list. Some of them even took the initiative to add Fucker, and it’s all okay. They’re real friends, after all. But since a couple of weeks ago, Fucker started to get “friend requests” from, how should I describe them, unmistakable shoe-ins for Mike Villar’s Atrocities of Friendster? Yeah, that sounds about right. But I may be too harsh on these poor souls so I’ll ask you guys for guidance.
Exhibit A: Glendylle
Her profile says she’s 18, but I call shenanigans! She’s the one giving you the finger. I think. But just in case, mind your fucking manners, little missy!
Exhibit B: MJ
I’ve got news for you, boy: No matter how strong your fairy powers are, Fucker won’t tap you! SRY.
Exhibit C: nAsty
Riiiight. “nAsty” indeed.
Exhibit D: Mitch
Now we’re talking! Fucker and Baddie would definitely tap that! But just to make sure that that’s your real picture, let me just check your photo galle…
Holy…! You know what? I think I left Fucker’s lights on. GTG BAI!
Seriously, there are more of them and they all belong to the same species. What’s the deal here? Is it Fucker’s name? Is it the jologs-y profile items? Do people who can’t get any really go as low as requesting a Friendster friendship from an automobile with a provocative name? What gives?!
I just hope to all that’s holy that these people don’t discover that other social networking site with a name that starts with an “F” and ends with an “acebook”. Stay in Friendster with your glittery background graphics, homies. Please.
Trivia: Most of Fucker’s recent friend requesters have “Beautiful Girls” (the suicidal, suicidal song) on their profile.
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Beautiful Girls?
What the fuck?!
I want to be Fucker’s friend. :(
I get a lot of those too. Especially from the friendster group I made for my friends. tsk, tsk. Block ‘em!
Plis ad me 2! I liek your hood, it so shineh! My email. Peace! Punk 4 ever! Anarchy roolz! kalesa_magwheels@mail-g.com
Another trivia: 2 people who sent Fucker friend requests have nude primary pics. Not that I’m complaining.
can’t believe you created a friendster profile for a rav4!!!! i was about to get one… until i fell in love with the 2008 CRV. hehe…
is the gun even real?
You’ll never know with these people. They’re unpredictable over there in the ghetto.
jesus h. christ!
Exhibit C scares me!