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I usually base my judgement in what comics to buy on writers, then artists, then hype, then characters. So by giving you my top 5 list of comic book characters, I’m not saying that I’m reading their solo monthly books. Well, for some of them, yes. I just find these characters appealing and kick-ass.
#5: Iron Man - Yeah, he’s got a movie coming out soon, but that’s not the reason why I like him. Never been a fan of Tony Stark in my 10-year comic book reading career. Well, that is until Civil War. Most fans think that during Civil War, Tony Stark became the ultimate Marvel douchebag. He did some things that, for people who aren’t really familiar with his character, are downright villainous. And that, ladies and gentlefreaks, is why I’m now an Iron Man fan. He’s a hero who will do what he thinks is right for the greater good, no matter how evil it may look for others.
#4: Fantastic Four - OK I’m counting them as one. Mr. Fantastic, Invisible Woman, Human Torch, and The Thing. Stan Lee’s harbingers of the modern super-hero comics age. Marvel’s “First Family”. Starring in “The World’s Greatest Comic Magazine!” Constant thorn on Dr. Doom’s side. I occasionally read FF issues before and I wasn’t really hooked. Until recently, that is. They’re just fun to read. I even watch their new “kiddie” animated series on YouTube. Good times.
#3: The Punisher - I was supposed to title this post “Top 5 Lists #3 of 10: Super-heroes”, but Frank Castle will kill me. There’s nothing superhuman about him, except of course his superhuman badassery. This is the guy that will shoot you in the nuts, and then blow up your remains with your friends and relatives during your funeral. After he gets finished with you, you’ll need more than a rhinoplasty in Chicago to fix yourself up. You’ll need a goddamn miracle.
#2: Batman - Come on. Who doesn’t want to be Batman? I’ve always been fascinated with him ever since I saw the Tim Burton movie. Of course, I just used to laugh at him when I was a kid, due to the fact I was always watching the old Adam West TV series. But after the Tim Burton movie and several awesome comics later, I now know who I want to be when I grow up. And that’s the goddamn muthafuckin’ Batman!
#1: Hulk - Spider-Man has issues, but “issues” doesn’t even begin to describe what Bruce Banner is going through as the green goliath. Superman is strong, but everybody knows Hulk is stronger one there is! OK there are a lot more interesting characters out there and Hulk’s not always a hero, but for me, Hulk’s the man. He’s the character I can relate to the most. No, I don’t turn green and my pants don’t turn purple whenever I’m angry, but sometimes, even when I feel that I’m the nicest guy in the whole freakin’ world, I just want to lash out and smash the puny faces of puny humans!
And yes, I’m a Marvel slave so there’s only one DC character in the list. Wanna make somethin’ of it? Please, don’t make me angry. You won’t like me when I’m angry.
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