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I am not a futurist. I can’t predict what’s going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month, or 10 years from now. I can’t anticipate the future even if I try. So I just don’t.

I did not foresee last week that I would be bringing a Shakey’s Manager’s Choice pizza to my mother, my father, and my aunts at the Asian Hospital last monday. My mom had a very high fever so she was required to be confined for a couple of days. It was their first real taste of my salary. 6 months after I got my first payslip from my current job. I was both proud and ashamed.

I did not foresee 6 months ago that I will last this long on my job. First, I told myself that I’ll probably won’t even make it to 2 months. But here I am. A regular employee of one of the biggest call centers in the world. I was so surprised that I made it this long that I celebrated by purchasing the DVD of The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King to complete my LOTR DVD collection, and the Ultimate Fantastic Four: The Fantastic and Y: The Last Man: Unmanned trade paperbacks. Geek heaven.

I did not foresee during my graduation that I would still be seeking the sanctuary and warmth of UPLB even when most of the familiar places and faces there are already gone. I never anticipated that I would love UPLB so much up to the point where I’m making the unfamiliar people and spots… well… familiar.

I am nowhere near being a futurist. Every freaking day, it’s always a brave new world for me. It’s not Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World where everything is so different that it’s scary. It’s a brave new world where everything is both familiar and refreshingly new. There are always shiny old things and new familiar faces. Nothing stays the same. Nothing is perfect. The imperfection of the world requires me to yearn for tomorrow. A chance to be better. And discover new flaws. New cracks in the big bad brave new world.

I don’t mind cracks. God puts cracks in everything. That’s how the light gets in.

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